sometimes funny, occasionally nude.

Mostly, I'm a writer.

10 Fun Facts That Probably Reveal Something About Who I Am

1. I'll always eat the last slice of pizza

2. I pay monthly, even when I can afford a cheaper annual subscription.

3. I always have flushable wipes in my bathroom, and I expect you will, too.

4. I turn the volume up when someone whispers in a song.

5. I'm always willing to help you move, but my arms are very weak.

6. I know coffee gives me insomnia, and I keep drinking it anyway.

7. I dislike all children, except one of my nieces.

8. I don't understand why people have dogs.

9. I'm still holding out hope for Ello, and I already love Instagram Stories.

10. I pay money to keep this published on the internet.

If Resumes Looked Like Job Listings

This Goddamn Blog Post